Changing my Way of Eating for Life

 It's been such a long time since I've posted on this blog. It's been a blog for everything in my life in the past. I read the last post Jan 2018 and realised how much I have grown in that area. I also realised how we build our own food philosophy and plans through the accumulation of knowledge. Not just knowledge about food though. Also, learning about how your own body interacts with food and exercise. 

For many years I knew I had the informational knowledge I needed to make a change. I just couldn't stick with anything. I had hoped that the Intuitive Eating (IE) way of looking at food would help get me over the line. In the end I didn't stick with that. 

At the end of that year (2018) though I had an appointment with the doctors. They put me on to a (free) health coach at their clinic that worked with me over the Christmas holidays. They gave me a meal journal (I hate those) to record all my meals. That in itself made me more aware of what I was choosing to eat. She also recommended I move to a Low Carb High Fat diet (LCHF). This was contrary to all I had read, heard and thought I knew about food. I was cynical. She gave me a website to look up, Diet Doctor. 

I went away and did my research and found lots of information both for and against this way of eating (WOE). I saw that it wouldn't take much to change my current WOE to this plan. I still had the 'treats' (donuts, chocolate, lollies) once a week and I expected a reprimand for them. The coach though looked at my journal each week and said, "You are doing better than I do." This made me feel like perhaps following this WOE would be achievable. I then added in 40min each day.

Contrary to many of the objections to this WOE there are lots of vegetables and some fruits allowed so you can still do 5+ a day. It's just that I was now allowed to have bacon, cream, and keep the fat on the meat so I could eat the chicken skin without feeling guilty. Perhaps this is where the LCHF plan and the IE plan met for me? Now I was eating guilt free.

I joined a gym (hated every minute of it initially) and allowed the staff, posters and regular measuring to help me stay motivated. I went 6 days a week and it was manageable at 6am - walk to the gym, 30min, walk home. I started to see and feel the results. I even became more aware of how food affected my mood and body. Now I realised that my wellbeing was being positively impacted and I liked the change so staying with this WOE was easy. Again, I still allowed myself to go outside of the plan on occasions e.g. special events, caught 'out' without the right foods.

Then

Now

Foods I have made that meet this WOE! Don't miss out!

The freedom that isn't?

Today as I read about the freedom that I am to give myself, the 'making peace with food', I realise that over the past week since beginning the journey of learning how to eat intuitively I have given myself permission to eat each of the foods that I have had on my 'not allowed' lists. With each food, not only did I give myself permission to eat it, but also to eat as much of it as I could in one sitting. One week later, nothing I think about eating has any appeal. I'm struggling with meal times because I can't think of anything I'd like to eat at the moment. I wonder if this is a normal response and how long I might feel like this?

I call it the freedom that isn't because whilst I am free to eat anything I like whenever I like I have lost the interest in the food. I still don't have the sensations of hunger that I need to know when I am actually hungry and I haven't yet discovered satisfaction in food.

Alongside this though I have also spent some time in the last few days discovering activities that I enjoy doing that are helping me to move. I walked to deliver mail and have a relaxing coffee. I have been tidying up the garden and dancing around the house. 

Becoming All I Can

I am very aware that my health is not all it could be. I am also aware that I need to begin somewhere to fix it. The problems are abundant and I have had an abundance of advice on what to do to improve it. I am very aware that my diet is appalling and I have many terrible habits that have developed around food both the choices and the way I eat. My relationship with food is not healthy and so I am working through a process of trying to fix it. I am beginning the The Whole30®. This is an attempt to reset my habits and my food choices. 

When I read through the material I was surprised and thrilled that coffee can remain (though black and sugarless). In order to prepare for this I have created myself a Google Form (see below) that will allow me to plan one day. It is quite basic but it contains the key information that I will need.

This blog is one of the ways I am working through the programme. Sharing what I am doing with others and enlisting help. If you know me and you are reading this then you can help me:

• Help me make good 'whole' choices at meal times.
• Remind me to sit away from the computer, put down my book and turn off the TV at meal times.
• Ask me out for a social walk somewhere. If you do this make sure it's not obvious to me that you are trying to get me walking 'for my sake'. I tend to get annoyed when other people try to organise me! (Apologies in advance if I get snappy about this.)
• Remind me to enjoy every mouthful of my food!
• Don't offer me soft drinks, alcohol, chocolate, cakes, biscuits or chips! I find it really hard to say no.
• And last but not least, let me know if you notice a change in my skin condition or how healthy I am looking. Please don't comment on my weight. I find it really annoying getting a running commentary from everyone I see. Remember I am aiming for healthier!

Why am I doing this? I often want to be involved in activities like kayaking, hiking, swimming, snorkelling etc and always feel like there are reasons that I cannot. I want to be fit and healthy but feel uncomfortable doing the activities I need to improve fitness because I am concerned about how I look. I am also fed up with having to take antibiotics to clear up my face and am hoping that this process will clear up my skin and highlight if there are foods which are impacting on this problem.

Thanks in advance to all my friends and family who love me and will support me as I work through this process. I apology for anyone I may offend as I go through the learning process and deal with changes in lifestyle and how that might affect my moods in the process. I especially want to thank my husband, Carl, whose love and care are always comforting. I know he will be 100% supportive of this as he is with all of the hair-brained schemes I've come up with over the years!